K-Pop Observations Part IV: A Conclusion

For the record, I don’t see anything wrong with liking or caring about certain singers. I don’t see anything wrong with thinking a singer has a great personality, or that a singer is funny or intelligent. I don’t see anything necessarily wrong with finding a singer physically, mentally, emotionally, and/or sexually attractive--some people exhibit certain qualities and traits that draw us to them. I don’t think there is anything wrong with being friendly with or having a positive “relationship” with singers--I think, in an industry that requires a high level of audience participation, there shouldn’t be hostility, anger, awkwardness, and hatred between a singer and fans. I don’t think there is anything wrong with wanting the best for a singer we like. We are humans, and, sometimes, certain people, for one reason or another, get into our bloodstream. The problem comes when we let ourselves become septic. In no other situation, in no other context, would stalking, harassment, assault, theft, threats, invasion of privacy, kidnapping, libel, slander, abuse, bullying, and, honestly, a plethora of other criminal and civil charges be tolerated or accepted--I personally don’t understand why these actions seem to be accepted, tolerated, and rationalized when the target, the victim, is a celebrity or other public figure.

To be clear, I don’t think there is anything wrong with being saddened by the death of a favourite singer. There’s nothing wrong with being saddened by the death of someone who inspired you creatively or professionally. I think having a role model in a certain field or profession can inspire and motivate us to follow our dreams and passions, as well as help us set certain goals and standards for ourselves. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with expressing condolences to the friends and family of someone who passed. I don’t think there is anything wrong with telling other fans that you are saddened by the death of a singer. The problem comes when you aren’t sad at the loss of human life, talent, and potential, but sad because you no longer get something from that human life, talent, and potential.

To make sure I’m understood, I don’t think there is anything with having a favourite singer, with supporting and cheering on that singer, with sharing the hard work of that singer, with having posters or pictures of that singer, with buying CD and other merchandise, or with going to concerts. I think the problem is doing all the previously mentioned things of one’s own volition, and then expecting and demanding something in return. I think the problem is buying a CD and expecting someone’s life in return.

In an industry where you are completely replaceable, where your personal and individual value is attached to how much money you bring in, where your only purpose is to become the ultimate entertainer, I think it is important to remember and focus not so much on what singers do and say as much on why they do and say what they do (within reason). That is, if an individual is brought up in a singular environment, with the same people and situations, then it shouldn’t be surprising if that environment, those people, are the individual’s primary interaction with the world. It shouldn’t be a surprise if individuals act and behave as though a certain environment, and/or certain people, is their primary contact with the world. If an individual is constantly hounded, abused, terrorized, and ordered about, then it shouldn’t be a surprise when that individual defends themself. When an individual is treated like a commodity, an object to be bought, sold, and ogled, it should not be a surprise when that individual feels lonely, empty, undervalued, unappreciated, and unloved--and then responds to those feelings with substance use, meaningless and vacuous relationships, or even suicide. If these individuals’ entire lives, including the lives of their families, rely on continual, constant, and increasing amounts of success, then it shouldn’t be surprising if they view others as competition, as someone untrustworthy and unreliable. These young people live every day having every single day, every aspect of their life, regulated and controlled by their job; having to be very careful what they say and do because the entire world is watching; having to maintain a certain physical appearance and aesthetic; having to protect their company’s brand; creating lyrics, music, and choreography; and trying to maintain a level of individuality, happiness, peace, and attempting to create and maintain healthy relationships. Then, on top of all the professional and personal stress, these young people have hundreds of fans invading their personal life, stalking them, assaulting them physically and verbally, harassing them, and causing havoc to and in their personal lives. We heap stress and trauma and anxiety and anger and loneliness and inadequacy (rather the feeling thereof) on celebrities in the Korean entertainment industry; then we take away individualism, personality, creativity, and humanity--without providing appropriate coping strategies and supportive resources/outlets; and, then, we get surprised and offended when celebrities defend themselves, stand up for themselves, or turn to harmful activities or substances to cope and to find some type of meaning and relief.

I do think that these celebrities are very grateful to and appreciative of their fans. I think it would be natural and beneficial to be kind, courteous, appreciative, humble, and personable to your fans. I think celebrities in the Korean entertainment industry are very much aware of how their industry works. I think celebrities are very much aware of the symbiotic relationship they have, and must have, with the public. However, I do think it is important to note that people in any industry should and would feel the same way about their patrons and customers. The truth is the relationship these fans have with these singers is simply a transactional relationship at worst and a business relationship at best. I don’t doubt celebrities value and cherish their fans; but, I think it is important to understand the way they value, cherish, and love their fans is perhaps different from how they would value, cherish, and love their family, friends, and partners--and that’s OK.

There is nothing wrong with the Korean entertainment industry, or even with fans, having certain expectations for their celebrities. However, there is something wrong when those expectations are at the expense of singers’, actors’, dancers’, models’, comedians’, and musicians' minds, bodies, and souls.

What I’ve mentioned here, and in my previous posts, is just what I’ve observed in comment sections, videos, interviews, and some conversations I’ve had. I’m not saying I speak for anyone or any group in particular; I could be completely wrong about everything I mentioned. My only goal is to perhaps get people to think about the words they use, in addition to how they treat the people around them (particularly the people they claim to love and respect). My only concern is for the people who are, and have been, impacted by the negligence of others who insist on being around them. My only concern is: how many more people are we willing to let become mentally, emotionally, physically, socially, and spiritually sick, or dead, before we start to care? How many people are we willing to sacrifice in the name of selfishness and personal desire?

The Korean entertainment industry is full of incredibly talented, successful, motivated, and fantastic people. These people deserve respect, love, understanding, health, privacy, peace, and success outside of their professional lives. They don't deserve the cruelty, abuse, hatred, anger, disdain, and pain they often receive from fans (who claim to love and appreciate them). None of us are in the position to throw the first stone--we have all said and done stupid, unsavoury, and ignorant things at one point in our lives. That doesn't mean we can't, or didn't, grow and learn from our mistakes. That doesn't mean we don't deserve grace, compassion, mercy, or a second (or even third) chance. The same thing needs to be applied to the celebrities we claim to love.

With quarantine and the other restrictions that are still in place, now is a great time to really reflect on ourselves, on how we speak, and how we interact with others.